By Troy Vincent
NFL Player Engagement
“I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” — Maya Angelou
The mentoring experience, as in having the benefit of caring mentors or serving as one, has greatly affected who I am today. An important part of our mission in Player Engagement is to provide student-athletes with the tools and resources they need to succeed.
In many ways, my mentors not only helped me on the field, but also helped to prepare me for what I do now. I have learned from many mentors throughout my life and, in fact, continue to learn from trusted advisors on communication and organizational skills, personnel management, critical thinking, conflict resolution, and how to build and lead teams. Most of all, I credit my mentors with showing me how to balance academics and athletics. I can’t be more appreciative of those who showed me how to be a better player and person.
And I know I am not alone.
If you were to ask any current or former NFL player if there was – or is – someone in his life who he regards as a mentor, I am fairly certain that every single player asked will answer with a resounding yes. Most would say their parents, coach, or even their brother or sister has been or is a mentor.
A mentor is someone who believes in you and wants you to be successful in all aspects of your life. He or she is someone who has the experience and desire to share what he or she has learned. Mentors tend to see things in us that we sometimes can’t see in ourselves. A mentor is your trusted ally and confidante. Through your mentor’s eyes, any weakness or problems you think you have are seen as opportunities for growth.
Those who serve as mentors to student-athletes are often credited with inspiring young players to reach their potential. Players often share that their mentors helped them change the course of their lives. Many will say that they don’t know what would have become of them if that coach, seasoned player, parent, or teacher hadn’t reached out to them at that exact time, at that exact place. Mentoring relationships go both ways. If you are being mentored you need to be just as engaged as your mentor.
Mentors are an integral part of sport. To benefit most, players must be open and receptive to the experience. During my playing days, I was so fortunate to find my coaches and mentors often being one and the same. There were many in my life who served as wonderful and effective mentors — my high school coach Jim Dundula, my grandfather Jefferson Vincent, Hall of Famers Emmitt Thomas and Gene Upshaw, Coach Barry Alvarez, Mel Phillips, Buffalo Bills Owner Ralph Wilson — just to name a few. But today, I want to talk about Minnesota Vikings head coach Leslie Frazier.
Coach Frazier was my defensive backs coach during the years I played for the Philadelphia Eagles.
Coach Frazier knows how important it is to build a mentoring relationship with a player. As a coach, he makes it a priority to get to know his players as people and not just as football players.
“I want to know about their families and their background,” Coach Frazier says, who was also a cornerback during his own playing days with the Chicago Bears. In order to mentor a player, Coach recognizes how important it is for him to personally connect with players.
“Over the years there have been a few players that possessed the character traits that tell me that they are highly coachable. The number one character trait is integrity. Players possessing that are trustworthy, honest, and respectful. They are also hard workers who take great pride in doing things right,” he added. “Some of the players that I have coached that exemplify these traits are Troy Vincent, Kevin Williams, Jared Allen, Brian Dawkins, and Adrian Peterson.”
Coach Frazier stresses that the existence of weak coach/mentor-player relationships can ultimately erode an entire team. He knows that when these relationships are strong, they bring out the best in every player, coach, and ultimately the team. Coach’s words ring true in my life as my mentors have been invaluable to me.