By Lisa Zimmerman | Engagement Insider
Torry and Terrence Holt know the pain of losing a parent at a young age. Their mother, Ojetta succumbed to cancer in 1996 after a 10-year battle with the disease. Torry was a sophomore in college. His brother Terrence, who is four years younger, was a sophomore in high school.
Growing up in Gibsonville, North Carolina their parents shielded their children, including their older sister Tosha, from the harsh realities of what their mother was going through, especially Terrence who was only six years old when she was first diagnosed.
Torry was clued in a little earlier and lived with an ongoing feeling of panic that he might lose his mother at any moment. At that time, although they had a strong and supportive family unit, they didn’t have a lot of information or tools to handle what they were experiencing during the process.
But, life moved forward. Torry, a wide receiver, starred at Gibsonville High School before moving on to a record-setting career at North Carolina State University. Terrence followed in his older brother’s footsteps, playing safety for the same schools.
In 1999, the St. Louis Rams selected Torry in the first round of the NFL Draft and it wasn’t long before knew he wanted to something to honor his mother and help others at the same time. He founded the Holt Foundation and then once Terrence (who was drafted by the Lions in 2003 and subsequently played for the Cardinals, Panthers, Bears and Saints) came on board, they renamed it the Holt Brothers Foundation. One of the things they most wanted to do was educate and support children who find themselves in circumstances similar to the one they had experienced as children dealing with a parent with cancer.
Among its many projects, the foundation works with Kids Can in St. Louis, as well as Rex Hospital in Raleigh, North Carolina, Duke Healthcare, Alamance Regional Medical Center and the Moses H. Cone Memorial Hospital. All of these organizations provide various types of support for people, especially children, who have a family member battling cancer.
Now retired from the NFL, the brothers are in constant touch with all of the organizations they are affiliated with. Their work is hands-on, meeting on a regular basis with the programs that are facilitated by the hospital staffs, which include social workers and other healthcare professionals who can provide the real facts and explain the nuts and bolts of everything from the diagnosis to the specifics of the disease to the treatment. Torry and Terrence also go to many of the support groups and share their own story.
Being able to speak to others about their own experience is also beneficial to their own journey of healing. “We were very young when our mom was diagnosed,” Torry said. “We had a lot less info. It helps us deal with losing a mom at a young age. It allows Terrence and I and my sister to talk about it and it gives us a platform to talk about how we felt.”
And there are many who go through exactly what the Holts did and they deal with that as well.
“It’s deep,” Terrence said. “We are dealing with life and death. We talk about the good that comes out of the program. But there have been countless passings too. We deal with bereavement.”
They are also heavily involved with Camp Kesem, a summer camp specifically for children who have a parent with cancer or who have lost a parent to cancer. The Holt Brothers Foundation created their Butterfly Grant to help support the work of the camp, which was created by, and is run almost entirely by college students. The camp is normally one week, but the Butterfly Grant pays for children to spend a second week.
Torry explained what is at the heart of all of their work. “Our goal is to take some of the mystery out of [the situation]. If you eliminate the mystery it eliminates some of the fear. It doesn’t take away all of it, but it minimizes it.”
Terrence echoed his brother’s comments. “We find that not being educated, you have fear. You fear things you don’t understand. We could have benefitted [from being educated about cancer]. Now these kids have access to information and can use it.”
They have also seen the full circle of the lives they have touched over the years.
“At our Rex Hospital ten-year anniversary a girl came up to me who started in our program at nine years old,” Terrence recalled. “She was part of our inaugural program in 2002. Her mom was with her. She is now studying to be a medical professional. She wants to help people and families with cancer. That was amazing. It’s what we want to perpetuate. We want these kids to go off and be inspired.”
For Torry and Terrence, their work has proven to be a tool for healing for thousands of strangers and for themselves as well.
For more information, visit holtbrothersfoundation.com.